Today is one of the few days in the year when I go home, walk strait into my parents’ room, say a good evening and say “Do you know what the worst thing you both have done in your life is? It’s teaching us manners.” This is usually followed by a narrative of the incident that triggered my anger and frustration with the way my parents raised me. Today, it was a stupid man at the supermarket who tried to jump line and rudely forced me to raise my voice in a public place for the first time in my life.
Without getting into details of what happened, because it is not really the point here, I have to say that I could have avoided the scene had I asked the cashier to just say who of us came first and not talk to the guy at all. But I had to since he waived hands in my face, shushed me, etc.
It took the usual to calm down. Venting to mom and dad, a shower, dinner, and watching cartoon (Last time it was Ratatouille. This time it is WALL-E).
Two hours later, I'm left alone with my thoughts. Day after day, I'm actually more determined to leave Egypt. You might say "No one leaves their country because of a rude man at a stupid supermarket" and I couldn't agree more.
I want to leave because my brother feels safe walking on the streets any time of day. I don't. He doesn't check his shadow to see if someone is following him. I do. He does not press the central lock the moment he gets into the car. I do. He doesn't pray every day that no one grabs him on the street. I do. He hasn't started the habit of walking with his MP3 on because he doesn't want to hear the nasty things someone might harass him with. I do. He does not get people jump line in front of him because he's a man. I do because I'm a girl. He can answer his cell phone on a cab, the subway, or the street. I don't do that to avoid the double possibility of harassment.
To keep it short and simple, let’s say that one major reason I want to leave Egypt is being "a girl who doesn't feel safe any more." Other reasons are already here in previous pages. You’ll sure hear more soon.
I want to leave because my brother feels safe walking on the streets any time of day. I don't. He doesn't check his shadow to see if someone is following him. I do. He does not press the central lock the moment he gets into the car. I do. He doesn't pray every day that no one grabs him on the street. I do. He hasn't started the habit of walking with his MP3 on because he doesn't want to hear the nasty things someone might harass him with. I do. He does not get people jump line in front of him because he's a man. I do because I'm a girl. He can answer his cell phone on a cab, the subway, or the street. I don't do that to avoid the double possibility of harassment.
To keep it short and simple, let’s say that one major reason I want to leave Egypt is being "a girl who doesn't feel safe any more." Other reasons are already here in previous pages. You’ll sure hear more soon.
Since I can’t leave today or tomorrow morning, I’ll stay forever grateful for Walt Disney.
1 comment:
Long live Wall-E ! I agree, cartoons are the best relief in times of crisis.
I feel sooo angry at that man for shushing you and waving his hand !!!! And for making you even think that YOU should leave Egypt, not HIM. And what did the people in the line say ?
Oh I would have LOVED to be there, because these kinds of things REALLY get me started. And I can be louder than anyone in cases like this.
You shouldn't get angry at your parents for raising you like a lady :) You know, there are times when one is allowed some "street smart" not to get stepped on by rude people.
Never get scared ! Walk as if those people should get scared of YOU !!!
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